How Joseph sets the example for men facing personal crisis

Being a lover of history, I’ve learned that crises have often provided the stage for a single man to stand in the gap, make a difference, and turn the course of history. I think of George Washington, whose leadership led the continental army to victory and the birth of the United States. In 1930’s England, Winston Churchill was a lone voice against Nazi tyranny. Because of his courageous leadership, he has been credited with saving western civilization.

At this Christmas season, another man comes to mind for his incredible contribution in shaping history. Often neglected in our Christmas carols and pageantry, Joseph, the husband of Mary, remains an example to us all. Joseph was God’s choice to be the stepdad of Messiah. His courage and leadership made a huge difference for Mary and her unborn child, not to mention to the entire world.

Examining Joseph in Matthew’s birth story (told from Joseph’s point of view) reveals some helpful principles for men who face personal crisis.

1. Compassion trumps personal pain.

We can only imagine the hurt and disappointment Joseph experienced when he was told that Mary was pregnant. Had he been like most men, his first thoughts would have been of himself, his personal pain, and the threat to his reputation. Had he been like most guys, he may have considered getting back at Mary in some way; the eye-for-an-eye mentality.

But thankfully, Joseph was not like most guys. His thoughts went out to Mary and how to shield her from disgraceful rumors that would be sure to come. “Not willing to shame her publicly, he decided to divorce her privately.” Let us learn from this. A man places the needs of others before his own. It’s not about his needs, or wants, but his family’s needs. Though shocked and hurt, Joseph chose to extend compassion. That’s what men do.

2. Character trumps passion.

It’s interesting how God kept Joseph in the dark for so much of the story. He did not reveal information to him until he needed to act upon it. Obviously, the Lord could have saved him much pain had he informed him ahead of time of how things would go with Mary. But in order to fulfill the divine plan, Joseph was not given instructions until it was absolutely necessary. Four times in Matthew’s account, at just the right moment, the Lord appeared to Joseph in dreams.

This is what it means to walk by faith. Joseph’s faith in God was the basis of his character. He understood the implications and would not have sexual relations with Mary until after she had given birth to God’s Son. He subjugated his own desires to conform to God’s plan. He would provide for Mary, protect her, and get her to Bethlehem because he realized what was at stake held a greater priority. It’s what men do.

Joseph’s faith in God was the basis of his character.

3. Obedience trumps preference.

Seldom do we consider the sacrifices Joseph was called upon to make in the Christmas story. No doubt he was certainly planning on returning to Nazareth and establishing a home for Mary and the child Jesus. Yet, when the Lord ordered him to flee into Egypt, he immediately obeyed. Laying his own plans on the altar, he struck out by faith to live in political exile. Not knowing how they would live or for how long, he put obedience to God ahead of his own preferences. Ask yourself, how often is your obedience shaped by personal preference? Do you obey when it’s convenient and only to the extent that it fits with your own personal comfort?

I challenge you to read the Christmas story in Matthew again, pausing to focus on the man Joseph. In a time of great crisis, it was his compassion, self-control, and obedience that made the difference. Let’s follow his example so that this Christmas season we focus on the needs of others, exercise self-control, and follow the will of God no matter the cost.