Many years ago, serving as youth pastor of a large church with a large Christian school, I became acutely aware of how easily sports can become an idol demanding one’s full devotion. It was frustrating to see students give so much to sports and so little to church. I became resentful and angry at parents who gave unflinching support to athletics while youth group meetings and activities were regularly neglected.

Forty years later, balancing church involvement with youth sports remains a challenge for church leaders and parents alike. Youth athletics is now a $37 billion industry, and many parents have allowed sports to dominate their children’s lives, willingly sacrificing whatever time and expense is required. Should we then be surprised by the mass exodus of young adults from the church since it was so marginalized during their teenage years?

I’ve always loved sports and was especially involved in football from fourth grade into high school. In those days, sacrificing church for involvement in athletics was never an issue. Sunday was still regarded as sacrosanct, youth sports were not usually scheduled on Sundays, and most parents were unwilling to compromise. But all of that began to slowly change as secularism deepened its roots into American society. Now, for many professing Christians, church has become a matter of convenience instead of conviction.

The question that needs to be addressed is whether the conflict between church and youth sports can be mitigated. Does it have to be an "either-or" or can it be "both-and"? I’ve often said the church is only as strong as the families that comprise its membership. Therefore, I think it’s possible to simultaneously encourage our children to have a competitive spirit and a mature spiritual life--and the solution lies in the home. Here are three guiding principles for parents in this regard:

1. Make church the priority.

Over the years my position has been that no parent should permit their children to have a job or be involved in sports if such involvement consistently conflicts with church attendance. It’s been said that children learn what they live, and what many youth are learning is that God takes a backseat to athletics. No sport can replace the vital role of the church in the spiritual formation of your child.

2. Use sports as a tool of discipleship.

Parents should be more than just chauffeurs and cheerleaders. They should purposely seek to instill biblical principles in their young athletes. Sports provide great character-building lessons for children, and parents should watch for and seize those teaching moments. Involvement in organized athletics can also provide parents with insight into the strengths and weaknesses of their child’s social skills, self-esteem, and attitude toward authority.

3. Communicate with other parents.

Coming together with other parents who share your values will help foster a spirit of cooperation and camaraderie. This is especially needful for those who are feeling the tension of balancing church and sports. Others are simply exhausted by the demands of sports on their already full schedules. Sharing the various experiences presented by this challenge can help parents, and even church leaders, clarify the values that shape their decisions regarding sports.