Faith Family Church is hosting a marriage seminar this weekend, and I’m wondering if the couples who need it the most won’t be there. In over 40 years of ministry, I’ve observed that men who enjoy healthy and happy marriages are more likely to attend marriage seminars than those who don’t. So, allow me to say it plainly: if you’re one of those guys who thinks, “I don’t need no stinkin’ seminar,” you just proved that you do.

It’s like pride. Those who suppose they aren’t prideful usually have the greatest problem with pride. And it’s usually pride that keeps men from attending events designed to improve and enhance their marriages. When that’s the case, rest assured, the fault lies at the husband’s feet. Generally speaking, women are much more willing than men to sign up. Granted, there might be good reasons for not attending, but let me give you four reasons why you should consider signing up today (and by the way, I’ve asked our team to today in case I’m persuasive):

1. It’s an investment in your marriage.

Like most things in life, you get out of your marriage what you put into it. Think of your marriage as a garden you planted the day you said, “I do.” Weeds dominate a garden left to itself, while beautiful gardens require purposeful cultivation. An uncultivated marriage won’t take long to sprout “weeds” that begin choking the life out of it. Unfortunately, many husbands are clueless as to the proper care and nourishment of their marriage. Attending a marriage seminar can provide much-needed guidance and be an investment that will yield a beautiful result in your marriage garden down the road.

2. It’s a demonstration of priority.

Does your wife know you treasure her and that you are grateful for your marriage? Other than our relationship with God, marriage should be our highest priority. Attending marriage conferences or seminars is not so much an admission of need as it is a demonstration of how much your marriage means to you. Investing time learning how to be a better husband goes a long way to demonstrating how important your wife is to you.

3. It’s an opportunity to lead.

I’m going to be completely honest with you: I don’t want to go either. There, I said it. I’d rather work in the yard, play golf, or hang out with other guys than spend my weekend at a marriage conference. But what do feelings have to do with it? What we want and what we need are usually different things. If we only do the things we want to do, we’ll never accomplish the things we ought to do. Therefore, leaders act on principle, not feelings. So, don’t ask your wife for permission, just do it. Lead. It’s saying to your spouse, “I value our marriage enough to invest in it. I want to be the best husband I can be, so I think we should attend.”

Leaders act on principle, not feelings

4. It reinforces your strengths.

Even if you’re a great husband, there are things you’ll take away from a marriage seminar that reinforce your marital strengths. Seminar material and the overall experience is not designed to expose only our weak spots, but to reveal our strong points. It’s always encouraging to learn you’ve been doing well as a husband, and reinforcing our marital strengths tends to increase our joy and confidence in the relationship.

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I have no idea where your marriage is, or what challenges you may be facing as a husband. What I do know is that every marriage is worth the time and effort it takes to improve. Marriage is the cornerstone of civilization and is designed by God for human flourishing. Do you need to pull some weeds and sow some seeds in your marriage garden? Register for this weekend’s marriage conference now. Let’s do all we can to support, honor, and build this holiest of all institutions.